Subliminal
by Craseelix1190
Summary: Lara Grey is not Divergent, but she is intelligent and cunning – no matter how much she worries about the future of her family as well as her faction. Propositioned to keep her family safe, she is forced to leave Erudite – everything she knows – and train in Dauntless. Caught between two worlds, Lara struggles to stay true to herself, her family, and her faction. Eric/OC


Chapter 1

 **Prey**

* * *

His smile almost made me forget.

Almost.

I sat between Christopher's hips, my forehead resting against his blue collar, his hands wrapped firmly around my waist. I didn't want to ruin the moment; it was too perfect and I needed something to remember, even though the cloudless sky was beginning to redden.

"You know you don't have to be so worried, it's not like I'm going anywhere," he said. I pulled back, my fists still clenching into his cotton shirt. His eyes were deep brown, reassuring. I knew I would always be safe as long as I stayed right here.

I inhaled deeply. "I know, it's just a crazy time. I'm scared that you'll run off to another faction and leave me all alone here to deal with my brother." The comment, no matter how flippant it was, managed to elicit a small chuckle from him. The corners of his lips crinkled, revealing a dimple. I kissed the small mark, trying to embed him into my skin.

"You always worry too much. We're both Erudite through and through. The ceremony isn't going to magically make you someone you're not."

I rolled my eyes. "No, but what if I get cold feet? What if I trip and bleed into the wrong bowl?"

"Only you would worry about something like that."

He was probably right, but still, the gnawing anxiety clawed through my chest, a relentless monster.

If I was being completely honest with myself, I would acknowledge that Chris had always been more Erudite than me. He was studious, analytical, calm. His soothing nature managed to seep into me, allowing my worries to melt. I let my head rest on his shoulder again, breathing in the crisp fall air. His fingertips began to knead my hips, his quiet signal that it was time to leave. I didn't want to get off the roof, I didn't want to leave the day behind. We still had a week but it seemed as though it was a second away.

"Lara," he murmured, holding me against him gently. "Nothing's going to happen. Trust me." He planted a quick kiss on my lips, one I reciprocated easily. Being with him was simple. Making a life with him was something that any reasonable person could agree to. I pushed my hands through his thick brown hair, grasping onto the soft curls. I would be a nurse and he would be a scientist and we'd have a litter of kids.

Nothing else seemed imaginable.

* * *

"You're home awfully late."

My father's deep voice echoed through the living room from wherever he was – the sound taking a beat through every corridor. The condo was large enough that people could get lost in it, and every now and again someone would, easily forgetting where the bathroom was at business parties or when I invited a few friends from school.

The blue halls and the minimalist belongings strewn about seemed to be mimicked around every corner. Sometimes I found myself stuck in the wrong room, and it seemed as though tonight the apartment had swallowed my dad whole.

"How's Chris?" My father asked, emerging from the kitchen with a plate of mashed potatoes and a small cut of steak. He had already prepared the table, something I hadn't noticed as I had dropped my keys in the small bowl resting neatly near the door. Guilt blossomed in my chest, tingling along my skin. My dad and I always set the table.

"He's good," I said, taking my jacket off slowly and putting it on the coat rack. Everything was neat, pristine. The walls were a cool shade of blue, my father's slacks a granite color with a perfectly ironed blue shirt. Even my own dress seemed too immaculate to touch, and I wondered how Chris had ever summoned the courage to kiss me after class three years ago. "He's happy about his scores. He'll be able to start in the labs as soon as the ceremony is over."

My father beamed, his auburn hair haloed around his forehead from the small chandelier overlooking the table. Quickly his eyes fell to the dainty promise ring wrapped around my ring finger. It was something Chris had given me with a small smile.

 _His hands pushed through his brown locks, a nervous tick. "So you don't have to worry about me running to a different faction." I accepted it, allowing him to slip it on my finger._

My father's eyes skimmed over my hand as though it hadn't immediately caught his attention. I couldn't read him, but I wasn't going to think too much about it. At least, I would try not to.

"I know Chris has been working really hard to get those grades. Does he know what field he wants to go into yet?" He walked back into the kitchen.

Jonas, my younger brother, galloped down the stairs and pulled his seat out at the table. He stuck his tongue out at me, to which I replied by doing the same.

"Yeah, serums."

Although he had returned to get more food, no doubt, I could almost hear his nod. "Good. More research needs to be done to create better, longer-lasting serums."

I sat in the seat across from Jonas. He was preoccupied on his tablet, likely messaging his friends from the coding labs.

"Hey squirt, can you pass the mashed?" I asked, pulling my hair into a quick bun.

He rolled his eyes, ignoring my request. "I told you not to call me that."

I picked up the bowl myself, angling a scoop onto the plate in front of me. "Okay squirt," I said, chuckling. He threw a string bean towards me but I dodged it, smiling triumphantly. I knew he'd probably get me back later somehow, maybe by recoding my research files or by completely rebooting my system. "How're classes going?"

Jonas pushed a forkful of food into his mouth but decided to speak anyways, eyes still glued to his device. "All right, I guess. Ms. Denim had us writing code today even though we learned to do that months ago. She's super boring."

"Are you thinking of taking the advanced classes?" I questioned, biting my lip. If he did that, it would mean he would have to move across the faction to work in the Main Hall, where most technological research and secretive lab work happened. I couldn't see my dad all alone, sitting at this big table all by himself. He barely made it after mom…And back then he had us.

"Nah, I'll stick with the boring crap. I've got her pop quiz schedule down to a science."

I couldn't tell if he had thought of the same thing I had, but I wouldn't ask him. I wouldn't remind him.

"Let me guess," I began, laughing as Jonas's hazel eyes finally met my own. "You created an algorithm to calculate when she would pass them out based on classwork?"

He guffawed. Like, actually guffawed, pleased I thought he'd go through all that trouble. "Nope. I just check her room every morning. She always leaves the papers on her desk," he said.

I shook my head at him, smiling. I loved him, even though he could be a major pain in the ass.

Dad reappeared, a grin plastered across his face. Almost instantly I could tell that something was wrong, and as we sat and ate, all I thought about was what it could be.

* * *

After Jonas and I had finished washing the dishes, I found my father sitting solemnly in his chair at the back of his office. His office was the only space that didn't conform to the usual Erudite blue. Instead, it looked like the old looking libraries that we used to tour in the Main Hall. Bookshelves lined the walls, filled to the brim with tomes about the history of the factions, even what we knew from before then.

He seemed to mold himself into the brown leather of the chair, his hair a mop thrown haphazardly to one side. In his hands he held a picture of mom, her eyes bright and warm, her blonde hair whipping in the wind somewhere I couldn't place. She was not in Erudite. It was the frame of her that he'd always kept on his desk, neatly positioned, never moved. Seeing him holding it in his hands threw me for a loop. The deep black pit in my stomach deepened.

"Dad?" I asked, cautiously, apprehensively. It took him a moment to respond. He was caught in some kind of trance, something I hadn't seen in years. I crossed my arms over my chest and prepared for the worst. Was he sick too? I couldn't handle it, losing him. Who would take care of Jonas?

An even more insidious thought crept into my mind.

Who would take care of me?

"Hey darling," he smiled but tears rimmed his eyes. He put the picture frame face down on the mahogany desk.

"What's wrong?" I took a tentative step forward, then another, until I was standing in front of him. He took my hands into his, wrapping them into a tight ball within his own. He shook them, gently, rocking me forward.

He breathed deeply. "I need to tell you something."

"Dad, you're scaring me," I said. My voice shook, but I didn't turn away. I couldn't.

"Jeanine Matthews came by earlier today," he said, the words sounding like cotton in his throat.

I inhaled sharply. "Okay?" It's not like she made house calls to Erudite apartments, and I knew that she would only come by if she wanted something, but I couldn't let my fear get the best of me. Not yet.

"She wanted to speak to you about your scores. She said that it was imperative that you speak to her before the choosing ceremony." I shook my head, trying to let his words sink in – have them make some sort of sense.

"She knew I would be in class. Why wouldn't she just speak to me then?" I posed the question and it was left sitting in the air, now thick and taut, before my father shrugged, eyes dark.

His voice sounded so, so frail and it made the knot in my stomach swell, swallowing my heart. "I don't know."

Those three simple words gutted me. "Whatever it is, you don't have to worry, okay? I'm always with you." I whispered, trying to assure him as well as myself.

I let my eyes fall to the picture frame face down on his desk. Gingerly, as though it might burst into flames at any second, I let my fingertips graze the unpolished wood. I picked it up, turning it until my green eyes and her green eyes met. I could barely remember what they had looked like up close. The last thing I really remembered about her was her big smile, how wide she'd grin whenever Jonas and I ran around the old apartment.

Dad had given up that apartment after she died.

"You never told me when this picture was taken." My voice sounded raw.

"You never asked." He paused for a moment and I turned to look at him, his hand submerged in his hair. "She was in Amity when that photo was taken. I was visiting as a mentorship to the vaccine lab to administer vaccinations to all of the factions. She was helping the people in Amity relax," he said, pausing again. "They'd never seen a needle." He added on as he chuckled, rubbing his beard.

"Then?" I asked.

"Then I fell hopelessly in love with her. She left Amity to have a better life with me and…" He stopped suddenly, and I could feel the pain in his pale blue eyes. Her loss had hit him the hardest of us all.

"What was she like?"

He shook his head, pushing the thoughts and the worries away. It was something we both did whenever we had too much on our minds. Luckily Jonas didn't have the same worries – he never shook his head like us. I was determined to make sure I'd never see the day.

"You remember what she was like," he whispered, hopeful but nervous too. What if I had forgotten her? What if the way I remembered her wasn't the way he knew her?

I pondered his response for a moment, looking to the window. From his office, I could see the perfectly trimmed trees lining the entranceway to the classrooms. The aesthetically pleasing atmosphere made me shutter. Everything here was pretty on the outside, but it didn't stop the darkness from rotting away the interiors piece by piece. Erudite's defection rate was through the roof.

I wished for a moment, foolishly, that my mom was still here to wrap her arms around me and let me forget the world.

"Only bits and pieces," I conceded. "Why did you fall in love with her?"

He bit his lip. "Who couldn't fall in love with her? Your mom was the most compassionate, positive person I've ever met. She could make a room full of mourning people smile. She was infectious that way, with this kindness…You could tell she was Amity." He laughed, throwing his head back. I smiled. "You remind me of her."

"Dad–" I went to begin but he interjected.

"Seriously kiddo, I know you worry a lot and that's okay sometimes–"

"You're only saying that because I get it from you."

He nodded, a wry smile pinned to his thin lips. Now more than ever I noticed the gray hair peppering his beard. "True, but you also have her brightness. Promise me you won't lose that."

I knew that to him, the promise meant that she'd live on, somewhere, in Jonas and I.

"I won't dad. Never."

Steadily, he stood, stretching his arms. I knew Jeanine worried him, especially since the last time he'd encountered her mom had died, but looking at him now, I knew that he'd be okay as long as he had me and Jonas.

"Get some rest. You have a big day tomorrow," he said.

I rolled my eyes but stopped, realizing I probably looked like Jonas. "Thanks for the reminder dad."

"You know you love me," he jested, pushing me towards the doorway with his palm resting firmly on my back.

I smiled solemnly. "I do."

* * *

 **Author's Note:**

 _**The story is set with Lara and any other characters a year before the events of Divergent. Lara is 16, Eric is 18, Four is 18, etc. **_

I haven't written in a long while, at least not on the site, and I've been trying to stretch my legs and figure out what to do with my old stories. I love them like they're my children, but I've noticed irreversible plot holes that I was hoping to fix by rewriting/completely redoing some of my stories, and ideas. This is a new concept with new characters, a new future for my writing and the stories I didn't do justice, on and off the page.

I've begun writing future chapters and I have a skeleton of an outline to struggle with fleshing out, so the more reviews I get the more helpful they will be at this point. **There will likely be sexual content and obvious use of explicit language going forward, so if you dislike either of those categories, this is your fair warning. When there is sexual content I will mark the chapters with an asterisk (*).** If you enjoyed this small chunk of writing, the characters, and the possibility of a future, _please favorite, follow, and review_!

 **Disclosure:**

I do not own any of the characters created by Veronica Roth or the movie series, nor do I own the plots associated with the book Divergent, subplots, extraneous worlds/creations and anything else by Veronica Roth and/or the agencies in control of the series. The plot that I create as well as any OC characters _are_ mine, as well as art that I create for it. The image used is that of the model Carolina Porqueddu, a woman which I believe would resemble my main OC Lara. _Thank you all for reading._


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